I was talking about the place I feel most called to yesterday with two groups of people - a CNA class that I taught a pastoral care portion of and my mother. And though I'm not feeling particularly pulled or called to minister to the elderly, I do love them. I love their wisdom, their stories, their calm. I love their quirks which they don't even see they themselves have. Like the elderly gentleman who went on and on about he loved chocolate cake when we were eating gingerbread cake. They're amazing.
And I have no doubt I'll continue working with elderly but it is not where my passions are. I'm in a position to reform the church. For my generation, church has become the place for fake, plastic, weak minded people to go and worship a distant, made up God. This is enforced by the many Christians who go to church on Sunday morning after bad mouthing others and lording their faith over non-Christians all week long. There is a disconnect. Like Gandhi said, "I like your Christ, I do not like your Christians. Your Christians are so unlike your Christ." Yes, Gandhi, it's true. And I'm so sorry.
In college, there seemed to be the understanding that to be a Christian, you were automatically republican. To be a democrat Christian was an oxymoron. And now, I'm actually feeling the opposite. If Christians aren't out to take care of the poor and the oppressed, what the hell are we doing? We can't live in our mansions and say God blessed us with this wealth so I could hoard it into a huge house and not use it to take care of others in need. Jesus disliked.... even I dare to say.... hated wealth and riches!
Now I speak partially as a hypocrite. I've been blessed with financial means and the ability to go to school without having to work full time at the same time. I grew up in a nice home and ate well and had plenty of activities that cost money. I'm privileged. And in truth, if you are an American, you are privileged. We have an in proportionate amount of the world's wealth. Go to Mexico and see what Free Trade has done to Mexican people. Go visit the south side of Chicago and see what white privilege has caused. Notice the person in your class or at work who has holes in their clothes. Talk to people about when they grew up and ate only macaroni and cheese for dinner for a year.
The point is, life sucks. The world is a dark place. And for those of us who sit at the top of the pile, we pretend or convince ourselves that we don't really need a God to rescue us from the muck and mire of the world. Life is pretty good, we say. (Aside from the midlife crisis and quarter life crisis epidemic and the alarming divorce rate and the amount of debt the average American has... but damn, we all look happy, don't we?!)
And for me, Jesus responds to that kind of world. To the world we are in now that is shockingly similar to the world 2,000 years ago. To a world where we damn well need each other but we better not say so because we are supposed to be independent, self sustaining individuals. We pride ourselves on not needing anyone. In truth, we need each other. Not just in how we function and contribute to the world (i.e. some are plumbers, bakers, teachers, accountants, pastors, doctors, etc.) but at our most basic level.
We need human interaction. We need to feel like we are part of something bigger than ourselves. Most of us only feel fulfilled our job contributes to the "good of society," when we are doing something to help out someone else. We ache to be in solid relationships with our partners and spouses and to create families.
For me, this is church. A place where we come and talk about how shitty life is and how much we need each other. A place where we recognize we are a part of something bigger than ourselves and that we have a God who is with us in the muck and mire of this world. For me, it is the promise that there is a light in the darkness and the darkness cannot overcome it.
And for me, the grittiness of the world doesn't detract from God. I don't understand the light without the darkness. It is what makes God most clear for me. Most real. Most necessary. It is that God I cling to.
1 comment:
"In college, there seemed to be the understanding that to be a Christian, you were automatically republican. To be a democrat Christian was an oxymoron. And now, I'm actually feeling the opposite. If Christians aren't out to take care of the poor and the oppressed, what the hell are we doing?"
About college, you're so right!
I think the political side of it is not saying that people shouldn't take care of the poor, but saying who should take care of the poor - the government - by demand, or the community (churches and nonprofits) - by decision. It's the desire to give and to help others that should set Christians aside from others, that makes them like Christ, as Gandhi says. When one is forced to help others through government means (paying taxes), it does not speak to a Christian method of taking care of the poor, not to me at least.
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