Funny how being "on-call" is mere letters away from a "call." Or maybe not. Maybe there's no similarities between being responsible for the spiritual care of an entire hospital and being responsible for the spiritual care of an entire congregation. I happen to disagree.
We were trying to decide, earlier, about the frequency of pages we'd get during the night - during the time when we are the only chaplain for the hospital. What if we got code after code after code all night? I suppose it is possible, but nights go by with no calls. So I was curious what I should expect this evening, on the occasion of my first call. Would I have everything or nothing?
Of course, you can't expect drama all the time. Likewise, you can't expect smooth waters all the time. So what do you do? I think there is simply a state of preparedness. Of readiness. As time goes by, that sense and state of readiness becomes sharpened. You learn what to expect while at the same time expecting the unexpected.
Will I ever be comfortable with the unknown? To a certain degree, I think I will always be anxious about the future. I'm not a worrier, but I want to know what lies ahead. I want to know what's coming. I want to prepare for it. There's this beautiful song that my friend Rob shared with me and it has applicable lyrics. I've shared the song before on my blog. It's called Jesus by Brand New. Here is the line I find comfort and irony in tonight:
(Speaking to Jesus about his second coming) "So do you think we could work out a sign so that I'll know it's you and that it's over so I won't even try?"
I shiver even now as I listen to the song.
That's all. Now I'm off to do my rounds. Godbless.
3 comments:
so, are you speaking to terminally ill patients about God? i'm not 100% sure i get what you're doing at the hospital. it sounds like that's what you're doing. Anyway, if so, my prayers are with you. :]
I am visiting any and all patients, not just the terminally ill ones. And not to talk about God, but to be there if they want to talk about whatever. I'm providing pastoral care. :)
You're not a worrier, just a planner, and the unknown cannot be planned. You just have to learn to plan for whatever happens and that it will be ok.
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